Self-awareness—being in tune with your emotions—may sound fairly straightforward and simple. But people tend to overestimate their level of self-awareness.

Of course, we’re all deeply emotional beings. Even if you think you’re in touch with your emotions—perhaps you’re someone who cries or laughs eas­ily—you may not recognize the full spectrum of all your feelings without digging a little deeper.

Becoming more self-aware is one of the benefits of mindfulness—the practice of focusing on the here and now and accepting whatever arises in our awareness without judgment. For a practice that focuses specifically on emotions, try the following exercise:

  1. Sit quietly in a comfortable position and close your eyes.
  2. Bring to mind something a little sad, but not overwhelming.
  3. Notice where in your body you feel that sadness.
  4. Place one of your hands on that part of your body in a caring, soothing way.
  5. Repeat the above steps but substitute different emotions for sadness: fear, anger, joy.

Increasing your awareness of these bodily sensations is fundamental to becoming more emotionally intelligent. When we examine our emotions carefully, we see that they consist of a bodily sensation accompanied by a thought, an image, or both. The more clearly we can recognize emotions in our bodies, the more clearly we know when a feeling is arising within us.

Sensations can serve as an “early warning signal” for problematic or nega­tive emotions that you might not want to act on automatically. For instance, imagine your spouse or partner says something that upsets you in front of your close friends. Take a moment to feel the sensations of anger in your body, but don’t react or say anything right away. Wait a few moments until you can think clearly before responding.

Another helpful practice is to keep a journal, taking special care to write down how specific events or personal interactions you had during the day made you feel. Talking with trusted friends, family members, or a therapist can also help you explore your emotions.

Reference: Posted in Harvard Health Publishing (2023), Available at: https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/advance-your-self-awareness (Accessed: 7 March, 2024)